i went to the psychologist today. he's youngish and has a phd and seems okay. i spent half the session trying to figure out what school of counseling he aligns himself with (that will make almost no sense to non-psych majors but basically i mean his style of therapy...psychodynamic, cognitive-behavioural, etc) i didn't figure it out. i cried a lot. i think though it was because i was nervous. and i don't like to talk to people i know so it was hard to tell someone i had just met about how it all started when my grandma died and then how my dad was an asshole to me growing up and i just felt so cliched. my problems are no different than a lot of people's problems. whatever. he is sending me to a psychiatrist to see if drugs would be a good thing. WEEEEeeee head fuck you up drugs. we also talked about my pot smoking but he didn't really care. he asked how much and stuff but that was it.

anyway like i said i am tired and i am going to bed. i didn't sleep last night till 4 am because i had a mild case of the can't fall asleepies and so i finished perks for the second time and weeeeeee go me.

nikolai go sleep now. she loves you though.

before & after