Erin quotes of the weekend:

me: I hate you.

erin: only if hate is spelt l-o-v-e.

it's funny dammit!

um i forgot the second one. I buried madeline.

~~~

Quote of the moment:

We crucify ourselves daily between two thieves: regret for yesterday and fear of tomorrow.
-Fulton Oursler

poem by me: (written when shanna was depressed)

no smiles.
no tears.
nothing.
I hope & pray for something
any glimpse or flicker of emotion.
but nothing comes.
And all i can do i dwell on thoughts of you.
of us.
the us that's never existed
and probably never will.
But still i pray, i beg the gods
for something
but nothing.
when, for one fleeting moment a ray of beauteous sunshine hope falls through the clouds of despair
my heart is high and joyful.
but nothing stays for long.
for in the next second you deny me everything
the nothing
i never had.

and so another day ends
and crushes me and rips my heart from my chest
and my eyes from their sockets
i can see
nothing.
not with my heart nor eyes.
i wait in the darkness,
the silence.
hoping for you to cast a glance my way-
something-
anything-
to give me hope,
to keep me alive.
barely- your heart beats for mine
but if you knew how much i depended on you for life-
you'd have me die
because for me to live- you have to give
something freely.
and so as i slowly die
because you will never love me it seems
i hope
i pray
please God!
hear my cry!
i howl for your blessing,
your boons,
just anything
i think will do.
but i still go on facing the reality that i have
nothing.

~~~

poem inspired by one above:

Why do you hate me?
why do i cry?
why do i hate you?
why don't you cry?

you've taken all my tears
i can't cry at all.
why did i let you in
only to be fucked over in the end.
it seems like it's been years.

no more smiles

& no more tears.

FUCK YOU!

before & after