::Control::
�new
�old
�profile
�note
�book
�rings
�bio
�cast
�email
::Celebrity::
�Pocket Bishonen
�my alter ego
�sacred cave
�recommend
�82% untelligent
::Previously::
02/28/2007 - lj
 12/07/2005 - moved.
 07/20/2003 - legally gay 2
 04/12/2003 - be my light in the gloom
 04/07/2003 - the best entry i have ever written in my entire life
::Diaries::
�abhorsen
�Aeryn42
�annericefan
�arkham13
�greschya
�justchris
�scathing words [john's blog]
�larrielou
�perceptions
�rachelle-
�solstice36
�thatkiss
�unclaimed
�wandering41
�whale-girl
dirty shirt designs
host 		marilyn monroe ::?::
Seeing:
Hearing:
Saying:
::Links::
�diaryreviews
�dland god/des
�dreamreviews
�fucklist
�interview
�oddgoogle
�poti reviews
�quoted
�r-e-v-i-e-w
�rudereviews
::Inner Demons::
�winsomekitty
�misskitty.scathing
�new orleans pictures
�dirtyshirt dezines
�ask-alice
�fat.girlie
�niku_neko.lj





visitors
2001-05-21| 7:46 p.m.
i <3 lotus
The current mood of Nikolai at www.imood.com
i want a tattoo. on my back. like i wanted before but never had the balls to get. a lotus. but i think now i would get the chinese symbol for faith underneath. before i wanted the chakras. this is just proof that my indecisiveness should make me not get a tattoo. i'd change my mind a month later & then it'd be too late. well anyhoo. here is a poem that's been on my website for awhile it's about my obsession with the lotus or rather an outgrowing of my obsession. whatever.

the lotus chant

the Lotus can contain me
the soft petals
the fragile petals
they can hold my rage
they can carry my hurt
the beautiful Lotus
the immortal Lotus
only you can renew me
only you can save me from myself
please Lotus save me with your ever renewing strength
as you rise from the depths of darkness each day
and bloom into the immaculate flower you are
O Great Lotus hear my cries and forgive me
take my rage into the mud at sunset
and rise anew in the morning
Do you know me Lotus?
Do you know this sorrow?
Can you take me with you everynight?
Can you close me in your petals and protect me from the world?
and when Ra drives his chariot high into the sky will your petals protect me?
protect me from Osiris
O Great Lotus of the nile
and I will serve you well.

that's it. gotta find a job tomorrow. oooh i got boiled crawfish last night yum yum :9

dat's it - ciao

before & after